Updates from the Giant

Where I kick it with coffee and Internet connection.

Thank you for those who noticed that I hadn't posted anything for like 2 days and sent out a rescue party to find me.


I am still adjusting to the time difference and its throwing me off. On top of that I don't have a schedule - I have Heathers schedule and dammit you MUST abide by that thing unless you want "The Wrath."  Internet single is scarce and carefully guarded like a Mother Lion would a cub. I'm dark out here, its basically whites, blacks, me. Oh! Occasionally there are a few middle eastern-ers but they don't really leave the Dunkin Doughnuts they own. I think they live there but I am not 100% sure on that.


So whats been up?


Ok so 1st day of coaching was Monday. It went over pretty well and like I mentioned to a few of you before I left I am in charge of Jumpers. Those being the long jump, double and triple jump, high jump and pole vault. I have one female who wants to try pole vaulting (it took everything within me not to make dirty jokes during this conversation) and 2 males who already do pole vaulting. One broke 3 meta-tarsals in his foot last year and the crazy little bugger still wants to do it. Hats off to him. He's is actually one of my favorites of the kids, probably because he is stronger and faster than the rest, so I have singled him out.


All of you forgot to tell me that Track and Field is an outside sport. SHAME on all of you. I didn't bring enough clothes or beanies or body fat for this shit. Every time we have practice I curl into a ball and get into the fetal position shiver and cry. It is SO windy on the hill where the field is. After this I should totally be able to pass Navy Seal Training....naked...with a smile...the entire time. Practice was short and we did some outside Plyo stuff like jump squats, jumping lunges, broad jumps and burpee broad jumps..so right away they didn't like me.
We went inside though to the gym shortly after the warm up and I gained all their respect by teaching the Deadlift, Press, Back Sqaut and Pull Up/Body Row. These kids only want to lift really and they were super excited when I said if I had my way we would lift everyday. They nicknamed me "Coach King Leonidas" after seeing me do pull ups and muscle ups.
Its hard to watch my language and hold back jokes. There is one black kid on the team and they all (including him) make racial like jokes - even the coaches, which kind of shocked me. I have seen 3 confederate flags while driving around, so naturally I keep a low profile. No one has asked me "what are you?" yet and I am sure none of them know anything about the middle east so luckily I don't have to deal with dumb ass questions like "are you Persian?"


Yesterday it was UBER windy and freezing. I until yesterday, have only been training the boys. When I was walking across the field I was approached by 3 younger girls jogging towards me. Naturally, I resorted back to what I did in high school......I ran like a mutha F**ka in the opposite direction!!! Kidding, they came up and we exchanged introductions and started playing 20 questions: "are you the new coach?!" "Are you gona coach us?" etc. I told them what I knew and when I mentioned lifting everyday which is my intent they lit up and proclaimed me the best coach ever. Then the lead female track coach came down and went OFF on them. I guess they aren't suppose to be talking to male athletes or coaches. They got in a bunch of trouble from what it seemed like. This may be because all of my paperwork hasn't come back yet. Later the same head coach asked if I could "take them" while everyone else trained. Turns out I will be training them. The boys were tested running sprints as fast as possible for time trials and I put the girls through the same warm up (they didn't complain an ounce) and workout as I did with the boys the day before.


In the gym they did a fantastic job. I could sense they were uncomfortable because everyone else in the weight room was a male. Trying to teach 3 female athletes surrounded by hormonal gawking teenage boys was tough, even I felt shy but they did super well. I used "California speak" and they thought it was amazing. Im like an alien here (no mexican jokes please). I was super impressed by how athletic they already were. Each could nail between 3-5 dead hang pull ups and I almost cried from joy. A lot of the other head coaches came out and over to check to see what I was doing and I completely understand. I have to be EXTREMELY careful of how I conduct myself. Ive always been able to be hands on in some way with clients but in this setting I have safety mitts, 10 feet of distance giving instructions behind 3 inches thick bullet proof glass. I get it though and this is how I should behave. I wasn't sure if they were into ANYTHING I was saying or doing but when the Athletic Director came over to see how I was doing the girls said I'm the best coach and should be head coach of everything. I asked them later if they were lying and they said no. I will believe them for now. I was up front with them because I feel like I need to be. I said if anything makes them uncomfortable or they don't want to/like to do something to let me know. I offered nutrition help which they all want and we ended the day foam rolling and stretching. Hopefully they will still talk to me.


I am trying to help Heather be more efficient. She gets caught up doing bs things and all of a sudden hours have passed. Unfortunately she is doing and handling a LOT. Some good, some bad, some just annoying life things. I am trying to help her as much as possible because she is overwhelmed by so much. I'm surprised she isnt fat because she has a lot on her plate (thats a joke people, do you see what I did there??) On top of it she tries super hard to be there for everyone and anyone but leaves nothing for herself. She spreads herself paper thin, transparent...everyday almost. We are having some pretty fun times but not even really seeing each other. Its fantastic to be this close to her though. Am I having fun? No, to be honest. I'm still living out of a suitcase, my bed sucks, the weather is worse I have created my own time zone and this is just me being a whiney bitch. I'm not having a bad time, I am some where in between. This is the transistion and I understand that, its not really suppose to be a blast and I was prepared for that. Its pretty relaxed and I'm not really killing myself doing anything just adjusting.


Today we should be signing the lease for the apartment. The apartment manager seems to be a testy bitch and if she rubs me the wrong way I just gonna walk out. I cant give someone access to my bank account, sign a contract with and be held under any rules and restrictions if they are immediately acting unfavorably. I am super excited to have my own place out here with Heather though. At least my clothes will be cleaner (its a joke mom.)


Eating has been kind of rough as well. As most of you know I have switched over to IF (intermittent fasting- google it if you all don't know or read my other blog) and meal timing has become difficult. I try to eat around 1, having to pack a pretty hefty meal and then I pretty much cant eat again sometimes until 9. There is literally just no time. I may have to switch my schedule around some but I am just trying to workout the details. I am not used to the stores out here so food choices were limited and unfortunately expensive. I am going to search out alternatives this weekend with Heather. I feel good over all except for the low back issue which I may have to see a chiro over and I am NOT at all happy about that idea. Sleep has been tough, uncomfortable bed (because its not a bed is a horrible mistake of a wannabe futon made for a midget) and its either super hot or super cold. I had another out of body experience the other day while trying to catch up on sleep that was very very interesting.


I just realized how negative this post is and how much I'm crying like a wuss!! Maybe this is my version of being home sick?? I'm just not adjusted. It should get better. I'm looking forward to it. I don't really have anything to worry about just need to get stuff done and help out the munchkin. Works cool and I'm liking it more and more each day. It was honestly like the first day of high school all over again; no one talked to me, everyone stared, I wasn't wearing the right clothes etc but I keep telling myself the same thing my mom told me my first day of Kindergarten "Quit being a p***y!"


I Miss my brother.


I'm rambling. Too much coffee in the blood stream, not enough water. Yes I noticed I used some bad words in this post, I cant cuss at school so I have to hear. Actually before practice I turn the radio up and sit in the car and go through a whole torrets-tantrum that would make a sailor blush to get it out of my system. Im taking photos and should be able to post em by the end of the weekend. Is everyone finding my stories?? See ya! 

Started reading this today, should be done by tonight. Its coming folks!! Dont get it twisted!!